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   When a man steals your wife there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
  ~Sacha Guitry

   Q:What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?
A:About 45 pounds!!
  ~

   One disadvantage of being a hog is that at any moment some blundering fool may try to make a silk purse out of your wife's ear
  ~J.B. Morton

   A woman and her husband interrupted their vacation to go to the dentist. "I want a tooth pulled, and I don't want any pain killers because I'm in a big hurry," the woman said. "Just extract the tooth as quickly as possible, and we'll be on our way."

The dentist was quite impressed. "You're certainly a courageous woman," he said. "Which tooth is it?" The woman turned to her husband and said, "Show him your tooth, dear."
  ~domineering wife

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The horror of that moment, the King went on, "I shall never, never forget!" "You will, though," the Queen said, "if you don't make a memorandum of it

My mama always used to tell me: 'If you can't find somethin' to live for, you best find somethin' to die for.

When I have finally decided that a result is worth getting, I go ahead on it and make trail after trial until it comes.

Jesus is like Sugar..

Uno sciocco e il suo denaro son presto separati; English Equivalent: A fool and his money are soon parted

I like you but I wouldn't want to see you working with sub-atomic particles.