BEER, Helping people have sex since 1865.
Crime doesn't pay... does that mean my job is a crime?
~cute to put in your aim profile quote
I'm very responsible, when ever something goes wrong they always say i'm responsible.
Give them an inch and they ll take a mile.
God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway... The good fortune to run into the ones I do... And the eyesight to tell the difference!
~sweet saying by Funny Life
Bald Guys never have a bad hair day.
T.V.~Why do you think they call it programming?
Reputation is made in a moment: It takes a lifetime to build character.
Mind your Ps and Qs
~cute to put in your aim profile quote
Have you always been this cute, or did you have to work at it?
Too many cooks spoil the broth.
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OK, so what's the speed of dark
I have great faith in fools - self-confidence, my friends call it
Getting down on all fours and imitating a rhinoceros stops babies from crying(Put an empty cigarette pack on your nose for a horn and make loud "snort" noises.) I don't know why parents don't do this more oftenUsually it makes the kid laughSometimes it s
There is precious little hope to be got out of whatever keeps us industrious, but there is a chance for us whenever we cease work and become stargazers
I do think New Year's resolutions can't technically be expected to begin on New Year's Day, don't you? Since, because it's an extension of New Year's Eve, smokers are already on a smoking roll and cannot be expected to stop abruptly on the stroke of midn