When ideas fail, words become very handy.
Due to the constant fluctuation in customer personalities, we cannot be responsible for the mental stability of any one member of our staff. (Seen in a gas station in Toronto, Ontario, Canada)
~cute funny quote
Once in Africa I lost the corkscrew and we were forced to live off food and water for weeks.~Ernest Hemingway
A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
I gave up drugs, sex and booze...it was the worst 20 minutes of my life.
~sweet saying by Cool Pickup
Why do black olives come in cans and green olives come in jars?
Stupidity is not a crime so you’re free to go
These are bagpipes. I understand the inventor of the bagpipes was inspired when he saw a man carrying an indignant, asthmatic pig under his arm. Unfortunately, the man-made sound never equalled the purity the sound achieved by the pig.~Alfred Hitchcock
If you know a person's name: Hi, [name]. How did you know my name? Isn't every beautiful girl named that?
~cute funny quote
Remember there's no I in team... (but there is a M and an E)
Where There’s A Will, I’m In The Way.
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Making the decision to have a child is momentousIt is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body
Better bread with water than cake with trouble
Remember, a real decision is measured by the fact that you've taken new action. If there's no action, you haven't truly decided.
The problem is not that there are problemsThe problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is a problem
May you get what you wish for