In politics, stupidity is not a handicap.~Napoleon Bonaparte
Hello? Oh, your body was calling me from across the room.
~cute aim quote
Dyslexics Have More Fnu.
I figure that if the children are alive when I get home, I've done my job."~Roseanne
Your earrings are the mirrors which reflect the moonlight into your eyes
~sweet saying by Cool Pickup
Why do we say that an alarm goes 'off?'
If your gonna be a turd then go lie out in the yard.
During the presidential campaign of 1880, the Christian Union made the startling admission that, of the nineteen men who, up to that time, had held the office of President of the United States, not one, with the possible exception of Washington, had ever been a member of a Christian church.~John Remsburg
First Prayer you should say: 'Dear God, I know you know everything, and I know that you know that I know that you know everything. So, you must know that I'm thankful for life... so I hereby say that I shouldn't have to spend my nights on my knees saying my thoughts to someone who already knows what I think. So this is my last and only prayer... it's either that or get me a damn kneepad.'
~cute aim quote
Eat right. Stay fit. Die anyway.
She's a lovely person. She deserves a good husband. Marry her before she finds one.~Oscar Levant to Harpo Marx upon meeting Harpo's fiance
If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always gotten.
~sweet saying by Wiseman
It takes more faith to believe that I came from a monkey than to believe that I came from God.
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He who neglects learning in his youth loses the past and is dead for the future
If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name in a Swiss bank.
Draw a crazy picture Write a nutty poem Sing a mumble-gumble song Whistle through your comb Do a loony-goony dance 'Cross the kitchen floor Put something silly in the world That ain't been there before
Labor Day is a glorious holiday because your child will be going back to school the next dayIt would have been called Independence Day, but that name was already taken
Where did you come from, baby dear?Out of the Everywhere and into here.